


learning to love

by deadwriter16



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Bisexual Kevin Day, Gen, Happy Ending, Reminiscing, Years Later, basically if you like happy foxes and happy kevin you'll probably like this, everyone loving kevin bc he deserves it, if you cant tell already this entire thing is about kevin, just kevin being happy, kevin day appreciation, the foxes being a family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 15:20:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28762458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadwriter16/pseuds/deadwriter16
Summary: Kevin Day is one of the most famous Exy players in possibly the world, so naturally people say things about him. One of the most common rumors is that he's cold, aloof, even unfeeling. And while that may be true to an extent, Kevin knows that he's become so much more. He's surrounded by family and friends who love him and who he loves back. And it's because of them that Kevin knows how to feel, how to love.Basically just Kevin reminiscing about his friendship with each of the Foxes and the people in his life, and about how he recovered and finally became part of a family.
Relationships: Background Ships - Relationship, Kevin Day & The Foxes (All For The Game)
Kudos: 10





	learning to love

**Author's Note:**

> I've never written all for the game before, but I think its good and I hope you like it!

There was a common misconception among the Exy community that Kevin Day was cold and callous, the price he paid for being one of the best. Kevin Day escaped a life with the Ravens and faced his abuser and worst enemy, and that was an admirable feat. And for years, Kevin’s donations to charity (which were secretly occasionally to the mafia; Neil’s fault), his dedication to Exy, and his famous professional girlfriend were the things people liked about Kevin, admiring him and looking up to him. And Kevin liked that, because most of them were true. He did try to donate to various charities, and Exy was his entire life. He did eventually break up with Thea, though; they just weren’t right for each other. 

Kevin didn’t think he’d ever met anyone who was right for him. He’d had Jean, oh so long ago, but that was barely anything. Just two boys raised in a broken home trying to find something in each other. But it wasn’t real, not like their friendship was, and Kevin almost ruined that when he left. But Jean had forgiven him, and now they were okay again. After Jean Kevin fixated himself on Jeremy, but there had never been anything between them, either. After that Kevin found Andrew, but there was never anything happening between them, not the way that people thought. After a few years of dating Thea and then breaking up with her after it felt wrong, Kevin realized that he didn’t need someone to make him feel complete. He didn’t need to love anyone, not like that, when he already had a family full of people he loved. They were the only people he really needed in his life, weren’t they? 

Kevin had never had a family before, not really. The Ravens didn’t count, because all they did was hurt Kevin and everyone else he knew who had escaped from there. Even with Riko dead, the memories still remained, and they hurt more than anything. When Kevin woke up from a nightmare and debating calling Andrew, or Wymack, even Jean or Neil, he ended up remembering Riko’s sick voice in his head, telling Kevin that he was a burden and he wasn’t worth it and Riko should just get rid of him but no, Kevin was Riko’s number two. His faithful lapdog, his hero’s sidekick, a pawn in Riko’s game until the very end. But the end manifested into something far different from what Kevin had imagined, because when Neil came back to the Foxes after their final game against the Ravens and told them that Riko was gone, shot by his own brother, then Kevin understood. He was Riko’s pawn, and Riko was his brother’s pawn. They were all pawns in the Yakuza’s game. But that didn't excuse a single fucking thing Riko did, and Kevin was still hurt and trying to recover because of everything Riko and the Ravens had done.

After Riko died, Kevin became a little warmer, opened up a little more. Or, at least, he tried. He reminded himself that everything was okay now, he was loved (kind of), and he had a good life, playing the sport he loved without worrying about his abuser hurting him. Instead he had friends, family, a team. He had the Foxes. And they warmed him up; the monsters stayed with Kevin at his lowest and the upperclassmen brought him to his brightest. They reminded Kevin that he was on the road to recovery and that one day he would be okay. And some days, Kevin actually believed them. Some days, Kevin was sure that he could be okay someday in the distant future, and other days Kevin had nightmares and tried not to scream and felt hot and wet and bone-chillingly terrified. And on some of those nights, Kevin did pick up the phone and dial a number, though which one varied. 

Sometimes he called Wymack, who picked up and talked Kevin through his usual panic attack exercises, tried to help Kevin cope from the other line. He was Kevin’s father through and through, always trying to protect him, keep him safe, make sure that he was fine. Sometimes Kevin called Andrew, who didn’t usually say anything but stayed on the phone, and Kevin would listen to Andrew’s breathing and remember how Andrew gave him a home and then Kevin would calm down. Sometimes he called Jean, now that they were okay, and they would talk together about the things only they knew, the things only they could possibly begin to understand. Sometimes Kevin called Neil, who understood in his own way, and they would just sit and talk about Exy.

Exy, the sport Kevin loved more than his life. Exy, the sport that gave Kevin another home, a wonderful, permanent home, even when he’d been abused and when he’d been injured. Exy lifted Kevin up from his status as number two and reminded him that he was better than Riko had ever been in his life. Kevin was the goddamn Queen of Exy. And Kevin didn’t need anyone except his sport, his team, and his family. So what if Exy fans called Kevin cold, unfeeling, detached, aloof? All of that was right, to an extent. To an extent Kevin was cold, especially before everything, but becoming closer to the Foxes dislodged something in him. Something unfamiliar but so beautiful, warm, and wonderful and it somehow made sense. Slowly, Kevin realized it was love. Healthy, all-consuming, almost perfect love. And it was all for the Foxes, all for Exy. All for the game.

Kevin Day, the Queen of Exy, learned how to love and then he understood. He’d been feeling it all along, for his Foxes, he’d just never understood. He hadn’t been raised to understand love the way most people gave it; none of the Foxes really were. They’d all had to learn on their own, and surprisingly Kevin was the last one to do it. The upperclassmen had taught each other love, Andrew and Neil finally found it in each other, and Aaron in Katelyn. While Kevin had no one for so long, because nothing with Thea felt right. But then Kevin broke up with her and found solace in his Foxes, and he realized that they were the ones he loved. So yes, Kevin was cold, detached, sitting on his throne as Queen and acting like he was the best. Because Kevin was kind of the best. He’d learned that when Matt, Renee, and Nicky forced Kevin into self-love. Kevin was one of the best damn strikers in Class I fucking Exy, and nobody was going to forget it.

Kevin felt emotions, Kevin felt love. Kevin felt happiness and warmth and recovery, finally, after so many years of being alone and confused. And Kevin was never going to let it go. So, if a few fans thought that Kevin was aloof, rude, condescending, mean, he could deal with that. Most of it was true. But what was also true was Kevin’s other side, the one he’d just discovered and learned to express. The side of Kevin that learned from his mistakes, recovered from his past, and loved the family he had around him. The side of Kevin that was good with all his friend’s kids and starting to get along with Erik after a few rocky meetings. The side of Kevin that helped Aaron with his proposal to Katelyn and ended up feeling something warm in his insides at their happiness. The side of Kevin that agreed to be Andrew’s best man at his and Neil’s tiny wedding and got roped into planning a bachelor party with Matt that was actually pretty enjoyable. The side of Kevin that was learning to have fun sometimes, because Exy would always be waiting for him when he came back.

Kevin spent time with every single one of his original Foxes, learning to love them and be friends with them and apologize for all the unkind things he’d said to them. A year or so after everything ended, Kevin asked Allison to take him to Seth’s grave so that he could finally come to terms with the fact that his abuser had taken someone from the team that mattered so much to him. Allison drove him to the cemetery and then left him alone, and Kevin knelt down on the grass and read the words that said “Seth Gordon” and Kevin said sorry. Even though it wasn’t Kevin’s fault that he died, Kevin apologized for all the fights and the pushing and the hurt and the yelling. Some of it was deserved, though, but Kevin apologized anyway. He’d never really cared about Seth’s death before, but he wanted to care now. Kevin wanted to care about everything forever.

After Kevin finished at Seth’s grave he found the car where Allison was waiting for him. Kevin and Allison weren’t close, but she put her hand on top of his and Kevin squeezed it and when Allison went to get Seth’s jersey number tattooed on her back, Kevin was right there with her and Renee, Matt and Dan. Kevin spent more time with Allison after that, letting her spam her social media with ridiculous pictures of him, causing general havoc when they were on press duty together, getting drunk at the graduation afterparty and taking a million photos of everyone else. Allison talked to Kevin about how she and Renee were doing, and how she really didn’t want to mess this up, and Kevin told her honestly that he was the worst person to ask about that. And Allison had laughed and then Kevin had laughed, and Allison decided that she was going to paint Kevin’s nails in the Foxes’ colors and Kevin reluctantly let her.

Kevin told Renee everything he knew about Andrew that she didn’t and vice versa, because they were both there for Andrew in different ways. Renee became closer to Kevin after he became closer to Allison, and she started taking a lot of interviews with him to protect him from public scrutiny. They’d have press duty and a reporter would ask Kevin a question about Riko, and Kevin’s wrist started hurting where it had been broken and he started shaking. Renee stared daggers at the reporters and gently pulled Kevin away, leading him away from the crowds of insensitive journalists and towards the Foxes. Later on in their friendship, Renee talked to Kevin about her past, and in return Kevin told her vague details about his that he was comfortable sharing. They bonded over their respective friendships with Jean, and Renee listened to Kevin’s passionate rants about Exy and history and Jeremy Knox and everything else he loved. 

Kevin and Dan were the closest to Wymack, since Dan saw him as a father figure and he was Kevin’s actual father. Kevin and Dan had been through a weird amount together, and Dan was probably one of Kevin’s favorite people to talk to once they became closer. Dan told Kevin about her days before Exy and how she climbed up the ranks and became captain. And Kevin told her how proud he was of her and she grinned and Kevin smiled back. Kevin and Dan spent the occasional holidays with Wymack, sometimes also bringing Matt or dragging the occasional monster. At Dan’s graduation they both cried, because Dan was Kevin’s favorite captain and he knew that when she went pro she would be absolutely amazing. And he told her exactly that, because he could always talk to Dan, and she cried even harder and hugged him tighter. Kevin didn’t want to let go, but he knew that he could always call and she would be there. She was his sister, after all.

Kevin and Matt started spending time together mostly because of Dan, but they forged their own friendship later on. Kevin and Matt started working out together, spotting each other and Matt laughing and Kevin appreciating having the company. Matt started playing video games with Kevin; they’d turn the tv on some nights after practice and Matt would beat Kevin every time and eventually Kevin stopped being a sore loser about it. Matt made it his job to show Kevin, Neil, and Andrew every classic movie they had ever missed, and sometimes Matt and Kevin watched some alone. Kevin didn’t understand some of them, not like he understood the nuance of an Exy match, but Matt insisted that Kevin watch things outside of Exy games and Kevin relented because Matt was growing on him and he could always watch Exy with Neil later. At Matt and Dan’s wedding, Matt and Kevin escaped from the reception for half an hour because Kevin needed a break from the crowds, and Kevin found himself thinking of Matt like a brother.

Kevin hadn’t realized how little time he really spent getting to know the monsters besides Andrew until he noticed how little he was actually friends with Nicky. He’d talked to Nicky a few times, but Nicky was bright and energetic and before, Kevin couldn’t really deal with that. But after Kevin really, officially, came out as bisexual, Nicky was there, offering to talk whenever Kevin needed it and help him navigate the public attention that came from coming out. And at first, Kevin waved it off, but later he came back and asked Nicky to help him through it and he did, and they fought off the press and defied discrimination together. It was Nicky who took Kevin to his first pride, the one they dragged all the Foxes to, and it was one of the best days Kevin had ever had. Later on Kevin made a real effort to become better friends with Erik, too, and eventually, at Nicky and Erika’s wedding, Kevin was there, happy for them the entire time. And so proud of Nicky, for going through so much but recovering and coming out stronger. Kevin wanted to do that, too.

When Aaron quit Exy and went into med school, Kevin wasn’t as mad as the thought he should be. Maybe it was because he and Aaron had never been really close. Sure, they lived in the same dorm and talked occasionally, but they weren’t really  _ friends _ . But still, at the end of Aaron’s last season, Kevin went to him and wished him luck on whatever he planned to do next in his life. And Aaron was surprised at first, but then he gave Kevin an uneasy smile and from there they started a genuine friendship that became much stronger down the line. Kevin became friends with Katelyn because of Aaron, and Kevin shamelessly used Aaron as an excuse to get his players into the hospital whenever they needed it. Aaron complained, but he didn’t really mind. Everything they used to do together, play video games, eat ice cream, used to be done out of avoidance of the other monsters but now they did it genuinely. And Kevin and Aaron could talk, sometimes. They learned to understand each other and become better people and Kevin was glad that they had both been with the monsters together.

Kevin visited the Trojans every once in a while, and later visited Jean and Jeremy in their apartment after they graduated. Kevin and Jean learned to recover and find things they had in common besides Riko, which ended up being easy with Jeremy and Renee’s help. Kevin apologized to Jean for leaving him all those years ago, and Jean forgave him and they became friends in a much more hopeful light than they had before. Kevin and Jeremy also became closer, and Kevin stopped getting that fluttery feeling of admiration when he saw Jeremy because now they were real friends and Kevin felt even better emotions towards him. Kevin went to Jeremy and Jean’s wedding, sat in the front row, and thought about how much Jean deserved this happiness after everything he’d been through. And how finally, after they’d gotten out, Kevin and Jean had managed to become friends again. And Kevin had also found a friend in Jeremy, someone who he looked up to. Jeremy and Jean were happy with each other, Kevin was happy for them, and Kevin was happy with the friendships he had with them both.

Wymack and Kevin became an odd father-son duo after the truth came out, but they loved each other the way a parent should love their child and vice versa all the same. Kevin thought of Abby as his honorary mother, and Abby always loved him like a son. Kevin visited them for holidays and flew over unannounced sometimes just because he wanted to see them. And they were always happy to see Kevin, their son, and Kevin felt like he finally had a real family. Nobody was abused, or neglected, or hurt. They were just loved. Kevin had never had a real father figure before, and he barely remembered his mother, but now he had Wymack and Abby and he knew that they were what he’d always envisioned in his head when thinking about the perfect family. Just Kevin, his parents, his Foxes, and no Riko in sight. Abby continued to tend to Kevin’s injuries whenever he needed it, and when she saw him get injured in one of his games she always called right after to make sure he was alright. Wymack watched every single one of Kevin’s games, and always showered Kevin in praises-well, Wymack’s version of praises-to the press. Wymack still called Kevin sometimes to help him pick Foxes lineups, and Kevin always picked the ones he could recruit for his team in a few years. For the first time in his life, Kevin had a healthy, happy, real family.

Andrew and Neil were everything Kevin had ever hoped for the two of them. Not that they really knew Kevin thought about them like that. But he’d known Andrew for years, and he remembered that apathetic, cruel, broken and scared boy who’d joined the Foxes. He’d started the monsters and established a reputation as someone dangerous, someone who couldn’t be trusted, except that Kevin trusted him. Kevin and Andrew put their trust in each other and it ended up being exactly what Andrew needed. Despite their relationship being tumultuous, they were friends and Kevin pretty much loved him. Kevin also pretty much loved Neil, the boy on the run who he’d known and not recognized for so long. The boy who could finally be safe as himself, Neil Josten. Neil and Kevin still loved Exy, and they talked about Exy and watched Exy and did everything Exy together, even when they were in different states. They watched games over the phone while Andrew groaned and almost audibly rolled his eyes over the line. But Kevin smiled, because that meant that Andrew and Neil were living together and married and happy. They deserved to be happy, after everything they’d been through.

All the Foxes deserved to be happy, and so did Kevin.

And Kevin was happy, he decided, as he walked through the clumps of his friends’ kids, ruffling their hair as they grabbed onto his legs. Kevin was happy, years after everything, sitting in Matt and Dan’s house for an original Foxes reunion; Allison's tattoo, a memory of Seth, almost glowing in the background. A very drunk Matt and Dan were giving a tour, despite all of them having been here a million times. Katelyn, also drunk, and Renee, who was just nice, humored them. Andrew and Neil sat on the couch, Neil excitedly talking to Matt about something while Andrew pretended not to care but was watching Neil with a look in his eyes that was definitely love. Allison was kissing Renee in a corner while the kids scrunched up their noses and laughed. Aaron returned from the kitchen with a drink, and put an arm around Katelyn, and smiled at her. Nicky was hand in hand with Erik, who was pretty much invited to everything now, while Nicky found Dan and started talking to her. They were all happy, Kevin knew, and that was how it was supposed to be. That was how it was always going to be from now on. Because they’d been through hell, but they’d come out on the other side of it. All of the Foxes. Together.

Neil found Kevin from across the room and lured him over by waving his phone, which was playing an Exy match. Andrew rolled his eyes and muttered a percent number because his husband never shut up about Exy, while Matt laughed and high fived Kevin as he approached. Allison and Renee saw Kevin and smiled, Allison’s grin wide and Renee’s eyes kind. Dan ran over to give Kevin another hug. Nicky waved at Kevin and yelled something cheerfully, while Aaron just smiled and nodded as Kevin passed him. But Kevin felt the love radiating off of each of them and himself, and Kevin knew that this was exactly where he was supposed to be. With his teammates, his friends, his family. The people he loved.

So yeah, people could call Kevin cold and unfeeling for the rest of his damn life. Because Kevin felt so much happiness and love; for history, for Exy, for his teammates, his friend's kids, his dad, his family, even himself. Because despite everything he’d been through, all of the hardships and the pain and the fear, Kevin had risen above it and recovered and become strong. He’d become a Class I Exy striker, one of the best there was. He’d found people he cared about and became a part of a family and finally learned how to really, truly, love. He survived and he lived and he  _ felt _ , because the moment he realized he could, he’d promised himself he would never stop loving the people who made him who he was, who helped him recover; his family.

He was Kevin Day, the Queen of Exy, and forever and always a Palmetto State Fox. 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!!


End file.
